What Now?

The fact that I am writing this on a Monday morning bugs me to no end.

The show I just watched on the TV disturbed me, its title was "Yesterday Once More". It told of a couple who loved each other so much that the husband hatched an elaborate scheme to keep his wife from knowing that he was dying/dead from a terminal disease.

It was supposed to be a romantic comedy, yet I've mopped up my leaking eyes countless times and ended up with a punch-drunk look. My expensive eye cream is useless.

Jeez, is there even such thing as love?

There must be, the Hong Kong movie industry is half sustaining itself on this concept.


--------------------------------------------------------------------------

"So, what now?" My friend asked.

Sigh, I wish I knew the answer.

"How are things between the two of you?"

I shrugged. "We're friends."

My friend knew me well and long enough to read into my response.

"Hmm, he slow or what?"

Maybe to him I'm just a friend.

"Well, it's clear to you he's more than that. You're always defending and helping him."

Sigh, I hung my head. Because I don't want to mistake friendship for something more, and leave nothing for us in the end.

"But surely there are signs from him, right?"

I think he thinks of me as a loyal sidekick.

"Sidekick my ass. He trusts you, right?"

Yup, enough to offer to let me drive his brand new car into Malaysia even though he knows I've not driven in more than 10 years. Although I haven't mustered enough nerve to do it yet.

"See?! See?! This guy I'm going out with, he asks me to close his car door with ONE finger. A gentle push. Don't even talk about letting me drive his precious baby."

Err, your friend is weird lor.

"Hei, surely there must be other stuff that you can tell whether he likes you or not."

Well, he belives that I won't treat him in a funny manner.

"Like how funny?"

A colleague showed me a BMW catalogue on his desk. I flipped through and pasted a Post-It note on a page showing a coupe, saying I wanted it. When he found the note, he accused my colleague of playing with his things. When she said it was me, he said "Sylvie won't treat me like that, it must be you". Ha ha ha.

"You are both weird. Suitable for each other."

Yes, we are, aren't we. I must have killed him or done something horrible in my previous life. Now karma is working on me, like I owe him big time.

"Ha ha, I've always thought love is a form of karma."

Ha ha ha. To think I passed on the rich Datuk's son. THAT is karma.

"Hey, we Sagittarians may be sarcastic, fun and enjoy the good stuff in life, but we are also not materialistic."

Make that die-hard romantics as well.

So, what now?